“How long,
O Lord? Will you forget me
forever?
How long
will you hide your face from me?”
~Psalm 13:1 (NRSV)
It would be a lie to think that
accusing God would comprise blasphemy. But many Christians, we can suspect, may
feel they have to respect God so much as not to speak a word out of line; out
of anger; to not speak their hearts. Why would we hide our words when we cannot
hide our desperation and anger?
Yet, being Christian is being in
relationship with God.
If there is any relationship that
can bear the communication of anger it is our relationship with God that can. The
Lord knows we need an outlet, and
an outlet that doesn’t hurt others is a premium which God allows through our
relationship with him.
What do we experience when we are
raw with our honesty before God? When we communicate in tearful words we hear
ourselves as God might hear us.
We may sound pathetic, but God has
compassion in mind, because of the fact we are leaning on him. Paradoxically,
our desperate plea reeks of faith. And faith pleases God.
Real Prayer Is Heartfelt
Perhaps the honour that is due us,
that which we, ironically, cannot really feel at the time, is coming because
our prayer is heartfelt.
For all the prayers we pray that
aren’t heartfelt, we can know now, through comparison with our usual depleted
authenticity, the power in God’s grace for this more heartfelt prayer. This
power communicates itself to us by an indecipherable healing. Heartfelt prayers
are healing prayers.
The Lord can only bless heartfelt prayer. And though we persist
in going through the motions on those issues we would like to feel passionate
about but aren’t, God would always prefer us to work on our passion first. If
we feel led to pray, best we pray for the passion to pray in a heartfelt way.
No Condemnation, But Compassion
If we can see grace as a thing
that has no condemnation about it, but is abounding with compassion, we can
understand that God honours our heartfelt laments.
If we can hope beyond our present
circumstances, to see God’s plan for us beyond the present contempt, we can
imagine God is compassionate and non-condemnatory.
If we can dream to the point of
possibility, beyond the shadowy ruins of our transient numbness, we embellish
our hope and in this God does not disappoint.
There is no condemnation, and only
compassion, from God to the heartfelt lamenter.
© 2012 S. J. Wickham.
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