Saturday, June 7, 2008

“So, They Envy You” – How To Deal With It

Why do we worry when we know people are green with envy over us? They’ll envy us so much in our success that they’re prepared to bad-mouth and slander us, even injure us... sound unrealistic? It’s not. It’s human nature to envy someone when you think they have something you want or need, and especially when you have a perception of lack.
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Envy is the “painful or resentful awareness of an advantage enjoyed by another joined with a desire to possess the same advantage.” (Merriam-Webster Dictionary) It is someone not wanting you to enjoy the success you’re having, for instance.
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Without being too simplistic, the envious lack self-belief and have a troubled self-image and so they project their own negative feelings onto others.
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If you feel envied and are struggling with contentious people remember this proverb:
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Like a fluttering sparrow or a darting swallow,
an undeserved curse does not come to rest.
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Proverbs 26:2
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The guts of the message here is ‘what is fitting actually turns out.’ It is not fitting for a good person who’s done no wrong to suffer punishment. Like these small birds depicted, who’re never seen to rest, curses don’t stick to people who’ve done no wrong. Bad talk might be flung in their direction but it rarely, if ever, sticks.
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The best thing to do if you think you are on the receiving end of another person’s envy is to remain quiet and only defend yourself to the point of truth. Be very careful not to be drawn into actions that are not good for you.
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Resist the temptation to fire a few darts of your own -- they’re not worth it. Besides, they’re the one with the problem.
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There are other proverbs that tell us that eventually we can make a friend out of the people who currently envy us. It depends on how we deal with them now.
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Wouldn’t it be great to one day say, “I have no enemies”? That day may never come in this life, but surely we’ll come to befriend those that might currently bear a grudge.
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It is never worth defending your own honour too much. Let your actions speak for themselves.
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Copyright © 2008, Steven John Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

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