Do you fail often? Do you, every now and then, fail to complete a task properly? Do you fail in your relationships with people? -- Every now and then? Do you fail yourself -- probably through one or both of the previous two by not living up to your own standards? Are the world’s, or even your own standards, consistently too high for you to meet? Everyone is faced with such questions at various stages throughout life, and we can fall for the trap of flagellating ourselves very easily; we may fail, but, now hear this... we are not ‘failures.’
s
I find the following unfortunate paradox… when I feel like a failure I sink into my shell; yet the thing I notice or sense most, at that time, is a feeling of abandonment from others -- I’m alone in the world. I can’t interact when I need most to interact. I think a lot of us are like this. When things get on top of us, and we feel like we’re failing at every turn, and we wallow in the defeat of our own consciousness. We can’t then escape our own negative mindset.
I find the following unfortunate paradox… when I feel like a failure I sink into my shell; yet the thing I notice or sense most, at that time, is a feeling of abandonment from others -- I’m alone in the world. I can’t interact when I need most to interact. I think a lot of us are like this. When things get on top of us, and we feel like we’re failing at every turn, and we wallow in the defeat of our own consciousness. We can’t then escape our own negative mindset.
s
How do we recoil from this sort of horrid experience? There are a number of considerations from not going hard on yourself, to seeing things from a different, fresh viewpoint, to simply accepting the status quo and finding a smile, somehow.
How do we recoil from this sort of horrid experience? There are a number of considerations from not going hard on yourself, to seeing things from a different, fresh viewpoint, to simply accepting the status quo and finding a smile, somehow.
s
Failure -- some days are simply designed for it! What can we do but take them gracefully and ‘on the chin’ as would a boxer fighting a title bout, and be gentle with ourselves, or take it to heart and sink into the feelings of inadequacy and shame even more. That’s no choice at all in my opinion.
Failure -- some days are simply designed for it! What can we do but take them gracefully and ‘on the chin’ as would a boxer fighting a title bout, and be gentle with ourselves, or take it to heart and sink into the feelings of inadequacy and shame even more. That’s no choice at all in my opinion.
s
I find being honest with myself is one step. It might take a few moments to sink in, or even a few hours or possibly overnight, but eventually, we must come to terms with the fact that it’s okay to fail; if we’re being honest. We’re not failures, we just fail every now and then. Honestly, we fail, and we fail often. So what!
I find being honest with myself is one step. It might take a few moments to sink in, or even a few hours or possibly overnight, but eventually, we must come to terms with the fact that it’s okay to fail; if we’re being honest. We’re not failures, we just fail every now and then. Honestly, we fail, and we fail often. So what!
s
This is what! We’re learning. Each time we fail we have an opportunity to learn. Okay, we might be sick of learning the same crummy lesson, but eventually it’ll stick, and when it does, hurray! Focussing on what we’re learning and how we’re developing and getting oodles of second chances must be a good thing. It’s also good to praise others who’ve perhaps more patience with us than we even have with ourselves at times.
This is what! We’re learning. Each time we fail we have an opportunity to learn. Okay, we might be sick of learning the same crummy lesson, but eventually it’ll stick, and when it does, hurray! Focussing on what we’re learning and how we’re developing and getting oodles of second chances must be a good thing. It’s also good to praise others who’ve perhaps more patience with us than we even have with ourselves at times.
s
To be successful at failure means to learn from the mistake; this does not mean learning perfectly though. It often takes several attempts. So what! It involves self-acceptance and self-grace too, or allowing the grace of God to shine through the experience and permeate our heart. Can you accept his blessing? His presence is enough. More than enough.
To be successful at failure means to learn from the mistake; this does not mean learning perfectly though. It often takes several attempts. So what! It involves self-acceptance and self-grace too, or allowing the grace of God to shine through the experience and permeate our heart. Can you accept his blessing? His presence is enough. More than enough.
s
Copyright © 2008, Steven John Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
Copyright © 2008, Steven John Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
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