PROVERBS
31:10-31. It appears that the writer of this section perceives it impossible
for a woman to climb these heights of character, and yet she is nonetheless described.
We
are best being careful how we apply these standards, especially in such a
tenuous area as marriage and family. And, still, we’re to consider them.
What
are the qualities of this woman – this wife of a noble man?
She
is Trustworthy in verses 11-12. She is safety for him, a partner who can
reliably be leaned upon, for she is sponsored by the Lord.
She
is Diligent in verses 13-19, 21-22, 24 and 27. Oh how Wisdom owes a
significant part of her very self to this one trait, diligence. It is only
right that the writer of these proverbs considers diligence such an important
characteristic for the wife of a noble man that there are at least twenty-three
lines of text dedicated to it.
Willing
hands are hers and the tyranny of physical distance adds no anguish to her.
Rising early is a treat to such a woman – to get the joy of her day underway
(for she is clothed with strength). She is one who is not only capable, but
willing to work hard for her entire family, including the leadership of the
servant-girls. From dawn to dusk, and then beyond, she is still working, and
she is prudently purchasing both perishables and land. She is not only mentally
and emotionally strong, physical strength is hers too. And above all – a
learner – she’s skilled too. Again, we must be reminded; we are to aspire to
such a lofty standard of energy and joy – and not be driven toward it in a way
to criticise ourselves. We hold to the vision of it without letting its
pressure crush us.
She
is Kind and Generous in verse 20. Even if only one verse is dedicated to
her kindness it is foundational in her service to all. She reaches out
passionately and unreservedly. She also teaches kindness (verse 26).
She
is Full of Faith in verses 21 and 25b. This woman doesn’t fear for her
household. Her diligence has served her and now she can comfortably and confidently
rest in her faith.
She
is Her Children’s and Husband’s Delight in verses 28-29. What a leader
of the family is this wife. Many might be apt at thinking the wife is not the
leader; that the husband is. This view doesn’t take into consideration the vital
leadership role of the wife and mother in every family – and the marital couple
as co-leaders or leaders in partnership. For the Proverbs 31 woman, her most
excellent deeds have “surpassed them all,” in the context of others, in the
esteem of her family. They have eyes and admiration only for her. How might
present-day wives respond to such single-minded and single-sighted familial
devotion?
***
The ‘capable wife’ of Proverbs 31 inspires
women to reach for the skies in nurturing virtue, whilst it compels husbands to
praise God for their wives. But it is not intended to put unnecessary pressure
on women. We aspire to nobility, but we don’t hold to it as an onerous standard
over ourselves.
© 2014 S. J. Wickham.
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