“Our peace and health and happiness all depend
upon our neighbour.”
—Frederick Faber (1814–1863)
We do rely upon each other whether
we like it or not. This is no better explained than when we don’t get on with co-workers or family. Other
people can make our lives misery, and bullying is a poignant paradigm with the
power to shift our lives into hellishness.
The great problem of humanity is,
of course, sin—in particular, selfishness.
Selfishness cuts us off from our
neighbour at our volition. And we are useless against the force of selfishness
much of the time. We covet our own needs, many times because we lack faith and
many times because our desires run ahead of us. Sometimes we do cater for our
needs diligently, including an appropriate self-care. But we are more likely to
grapple for our needs (and wants) because of selfishness. We do this both
consciously and unconsciously, with intent and by accident.
What covers for this horrendous
condition is the grace of God. We no longer need to be perfect, as the
Pharisees tried to be, but we are commanded to love our neighbour.
We are commanded to elevate our
neighbour’s needs to at least the same level as we elevate our own needs.
God’s Ideal – The Interdependence of
Humanity
We are dependent upon others as
others are dependent upon us. This is how God has made our societies to work.
It is a model that relies upon love—the giving, one to another and back again
through reciprocity, of what we would deem as necessary for ourselves in the
same circumstances.
When we do to others as we would
have them do to us we obey the command of love.
This is the principle of
interdependence—to be mutually dependent on each other—how we care for each other
because we rely upon each other. But we are more apt to deny the fact that we
rely on others. We are more independent than interdependent, until, that is, when
we really need someone’s help, and then we tip the balance past interdependence
and into situational dependence.
Selfishness has us vacillating
between independence and dependence, when God’s will is for us to find the
balance between the two and make way for interdependence.
But the reality is our surrendered
will to be interdependent isn’t always reciprocated; most of the time it won’t
be. Our kindness is returned to us by others in fashions of greed. Our humility
creates room for others’ pride. Of course, when others are kind to us we don’t
always return the favour. When others are humble, sometimes we are prideful.
Our challenge is to overcome our
situational selfishness. When we do, interdependence has a chance.
***
Life on Earth depends on love—for
us to be mutually dependent upon each other. But sin, manifest in selfishness,
has spoilt God’s plan. If we are to love one another we must get over our selfishness
and surrender to God by being mutually dependent upon each other.
Love thy neighbour starts from us
and ends there, too. Our biggest test of faith is to consistently love our
neighbour. God’s grace is sufficient to enable us to do that, one moment at a
time.
© 2012 S. J. Wickham.
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