Tuesday, April 21, 2020

Surviving spiritual abuse requires more faith than abusers have

If God favours those who are surviving under the nerve of spiritual attack, all the more does God esteem the person enduring abuse for the prodigious faith that that takes — to endure it and to not lose faith.
How ironic is it, then, when someone sees themselves as spiritually superior, and by doing so, undermines their own standing before God?
If God is “in” anything, our Lord of creation is into kingdom reversals.  God is into justice for the oppressed.  Much of what Jesus did was about this.
Jesus cares for those in their struggle of oppression, poignantly, where they are misunderstood, blamed, gaslit, spoken about, dismissed, looked down upon, excluded.
As far as being spiritually abused is concerned, it takes amazing faith to endure:
·                   constant ‘biblical’ correction when there is no need of it – for instance, when Bible verses are thrown at you out of context
·                   being repeatedly told you are weak and need to have more faith – especially when you face loss and the grief is overwhelming (enduring loss requires incredible faith; more than many realise)
·                   baseless questioning as to where your identity’s at – especially when the questioner is a source of identity erosion
·                   criticism for not being a better church or family member
·                   condemnation for your unwise response, especially when you, yourself, would like to have responded better and would love the opportunity to unreservedly apologise from the heart – and to receive their full acquittal
·                   a pattern of betrayal, which continues to deepen the furrows of trauma – especially where you still hold out hope of their repentance, and possibly also the restoration of the relationship
·                   assaults on others you care about as well as yourself, and to remain steadfastly committed to peace, notwithstanding the anxiety such assaults generate
·                   everything you have experienced and not lose faith, especially where you’ve been diligent to ensure cutting words or themes have not been allowed to stick
If, by chance, you find yourself in the land of the Beatitudes — poor of spirit, mournful, meek, merciful, etc — take heart, that even if you are accused of lacking faith, God is showing the rest of the world just how much faith you DO have.
The important proviso, of course, is our response when we face these attacks.  Standing up under abuse isn’t easy, and it isn’t the only thing that God wants us to do.
You are blessed by responding the right way when you are cursed, because, on the account of the abuse, God is taking a special interest in you as your Avenger, for the fact that a human has made a target out of you.  God particularly wishes to see you treat them with the grace you haven’t received.  No matter how you slice it, that’s hard to do unless we do it in the power of God!
Now, it’s okay if you are still not getting it perfectly right, because God will provide more opportunities for you to grow in this grace.
Perhaps you can see how being lost for words in response has actually pleased God?
God must understand you being resentful about how you are being treated, and yet confirms to your heart the resolution you still hope for.
Especially if in this present COVID-19 season you have been under crucial financial, medical or social attack, and you are surviving, even if only just, your faith is massive.
Evidence that you have more faith than the person who is spiritually abusing you is obvious when you are not attacking them, especially if you are too hurt to respond.  They are showing not only less faith because of the practices they are engaging in with you, but they’re sinning against you and God.
So, you are right if you don’t counterattack, though forgive yourself if you’ve fallen occasionally into this, and are prepared to make amends or have made amends.
Chances are you are shocked by what you’ve faced.  Better to be traumatised and even scandalised than to engage in such practices.
To sustain your faith through the brutality of spiritual abuse is a miracle of faith.
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It is a testament to your faith that you have not succumbed to the temptation to leave faith altogether, because so many have and so many do.


Photo by Sage Friedman on Unsplash

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