Friday, October 10, 2008

Do Not Be Carried On The Backs Of Fools

Advice we can all do with relates to how we should handle the foolish.

And if we have any interest at all in succeeding in relationships and life then we should attend to wisdom about the foolish.

Balthasar Gracian says, “Do not carry fools on your back.”

“He that does not know a fool when he sees him is one himself: still more he that knows him but will not keep clear of him. They are dangerous company and ruinous confidants.”

We are surrounded by them, if we take a good look around. These are the loud and the vexatious as well as the quietly proud who think themselves too good. They trip up endlessly but attribute it to others and therefore never learn. They’re destined for the same mistakes though they know it not. When we curry favour with fools we tread dangerously, especially when we constantly entertain how easily we could go onto the next thing, never actually doing so.

Gossips are by their very nature, fools. They give themselves away in a matter of seconds. Recently at a KFC store as my daughters and I ate, I heard one to my rear, and the sound and tone of her voice spoke it clearly to me within seconds. I knew it was only a matter of time before she started betraying her confidences and I was right. I felt sorry for her. She obviously did not have the right models of behaviour to draw from. She dominated the conversation with two young men who clearly did not know what to say. Ripples of relief exuded from their table to my rear as she left them.

“They cannot help another’s credit who have none of their own. They are most unlucky, which is the Nemesis of fools, and they have to pay for one thing or the other.”

Another sign of the fool is their reputation; if it’s tarnished there’s a reason. We hang with fools and our reputations too will suffer; we’ll be guilty by association. For every fool’s been ‘unlucky’ enough to get the raw deal; life’s plain not fair for these one’s so easily afflicted. The proof is in the pudding they say and surely if someone is wise enough to not continue in the foolish way their fortunes do eventually return at some point. And this is the point. It’s about the ability to learn; fools won’t and don’t in the general sense.

“There is only one thing which is not so bad about them, and this is that though they can be of no use to the wise, they can be of much use to them as signposts or as warnings.”

Fools are good for us if only in this above statement; they assist our way as we use them as buoys and channel markers; beacons to steer clear of. They can show us the right way through their presence as the wrong way. If they were not so clear, discerning the right way would be more difficult and that’d mean we’d surely fall for foolishness more. We’re all apt toward foolishness without attending to the right direction.

Relationships

We can choose our friends but not our family; but if we make the wrong choices or even if we don’t have that luxury i.e. family, what do we do when faced with rank foolishness and selfishness? We employ the same methods as espoused above; we steer clear of them as much as possible whilst they’re like this. Foolishness should not be contended with. We can see that this might mean very little time with some people... we can even engage in this sort of behaviour in someone’s direct presence. Think about it.

Foolishness is countered effectively most of the time with the virtue of prudence.

All quotations in this article are from Balthasar Gracian’s, 197th Aphorism, “Do not carry fools on your back.”

Copyright © 2008, S. J. Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

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