Resilience is Elastic

A thick rubber band we customarily fit to packages and so forth shows us the quality of fitting any shape or size within the bounds of its design and construction; it’s flexible by design. It does not ordinarily or easily bust or snap without reason. If it did, it would be because of ultraviolet light damage or age, or for some other reason.

Like the physical quality of elasticity, resilience is the human quality of adapting flexibly to the needs of the given situation. In other words, those with great resilience ‘snap’ back rapidly from loss and disappointment; they believe innately that these issues are not going to stop them doing what they choose to do. And not only do they believe this, they have the actual ability to adapt their thinking response and behaviour to the new situation. They’re inspired and not beaten with despair.

As the rubber band also holds tightly around the package or shape it contains, the resilient also meet the stretch required of them and they sustain the required grip on the situation at hand as long as they need to. They adapt to the situation and they do not give in easily.

The fascinating thing is resilience is elastic; and the elasticity quality can actually grow. This elastic quality is adaptability and it is driven firmly by faith. This faith can come from a variety of sources and need not always be ‘good’ faith i.e. faith based in truth, though it inevitably helps. If we have faith in our ability and also have a fervent hope for a good, positive result, we can literally achieve almost anything.

So, how would we grow our resilience, making it more pliable and elastic? Well, it gets back to that quote of Tom Peters a couple of posts ago, “Excellent companies provide two things simultaneously: tough environments and very supportive environments.” We can stretch to adapt; the resilient person’s resolve is not easily broken and their minds are designed to conform. Conforming in this way is no robot or subservient behaviour; the resilient are actually strong enough to conform cheerfully.

When we finally learn that we’re designed to become resilient and that we can truly achieve and bear with much more than we thought we could, we entertain the prospect that adapting as a life choice is far superior to giving in; and we want to do it more, and even all the time. (This is acknowledging that we’re presented with choices to be resilient or give in every day.)

However, there’s a catch. We grow our resilience in a slow, time-honoured way and it’s grown more by osmosis (a gradual, often unconscious process of assimilation or absorption[1]) than any other way. Like most good things acquired in life, there’s no short cuts. We have to jump through the hoops in order.

The butt of the issue is this: The next time we complain of hardship, yet we wish to grow, we should remember that this, right here--the problem, issue or difficulty, is an opportunity presented before us to grow the elasticity of resilience. It needs to be recognised as a far-off goal. It will never seem easy; but years down the track we’ll suddenly realise our capacity and capabilities have grown much more than we’d realised. Allowing life to hit us and dealing with it, without complaining, is the ideal we should be aiming for. Again, it’s easier said than done.

Copyright © 2008, S. J. Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

[1] http://www.thefreedictionary.com/osmosis