Monday, November 23, 2020

Frustration and irritability – signposts of early-stage depression


Whenever I’ve seen frustration and irritability in myself or others it’s switched a light on for me.  It’s like others can see it but we cannot, when we’re beyond reason in our being confounded by the simplest of things.

It’s so easy, too easy, to fall gradually into the abyss of depression, and what starts it often is the telltale signs of frustration and irritability that signal fear has entered the narrative.

This form of fear insidiously sneaks up and cavorts as anger.  And to make things more complicated there’s sadness too — sorrow that we cannot have the level of control that we would wish to exert over our lives or situations of our life.

One sure way of determining whether we’re entering the sinkhole is to ask ourselves how much we’re expecting to impact our circle of concern — those things we want different but have no control over.

The way we stay out of running headlong into a rut is by being disciplined enough to only be concerned about those things we have an influence over — the circle of influence.

One of the simplest most profound pieces of wisdom is the prayer for serenity:

God,
give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, 
courage to change the things I can, 
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Serenity, courage, wisdom.  All because the person who prays this prayer stays within their circle of influence.  They refuse to enter the madness of expecting change in areas of life they have no control over.

When a person understands their frustration and irritability are rooted in hopes that can’t be met, they begin to comprehend the path they’re on.  They see it’s nonsensical, and they commence a diligent path of wisdom that seeks ordered steps.

Avoiding full-blown depression is helped along by the peace of acceptance.  The mature life accepts none of us are ever completely satisfied.  We all want something we cannot have, and most of us want many things we cannot have.

Frustration and irritability are important signs we’re on the wrong path.

There are many situations and seasons of life when we’re justifiably frustrated and irritable.  The problem, however, is no matter how justified these emotions are, they never take us in the right direction.  We would always be better searching for — and finding — our peace.

Peace is in rest, and in coming back into the eternality of the fact that we’re all but dust.

We need to re-enter our smallness, stop imagining we have any power at all, and then, straightaway, we begin to see the kingdom of heaven come into view.  Humility truly is the key to it all.

Serenity.  Courage.  Wisdom.

Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash

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