Reflecting over a lifetime, one decade at a time

Having been a human being well over fifty years and having had vocations aligned to the psychology of humanity for nearly half my life, I can attest to the fact that basically no human being feels “perfect” at any time.  Being human isn’t ever easy.  We never stand apart from our humanity.  We can never unthink, unknow, or unfeel our way in this life.

Then we die.

Not to depress you, but at this juncture of life—at the end of a year—it’s normal and natural to engage in reflection.  Those who don’t, miss out.

I like to take a “life scan” at the end of each year, and that’s about reviewing our lives at 10-year intervals and imagining what life might hold in future 10-year intervals.  A life scan is a reflective activity designed to ease us into reflecting over our lives to this point, and then to impel our thinking forward to what might be.

Here’s mine for this year:

2022

A very significant year for several reasons.  Mum died.  A week after Mum’s funeral, my third grandchild was born.  The key word I would use for this year is “conclusion” as many things reached a state of conclusion.  Good and not-so-good, but mainly good, and there are even good aspects of Mum’s passing—family were there, and she’d lived a life of love at the very least.  In so many ways, some things that started ten years ago concluded.  But with conclusions there are also fresh starts, so 2023 begins with expectation.

2012

The year I turned 45 was significant because it was also a setting up year.  I qualified as a counsellor at the year’s end, my wife was pregnant with our son, and at the end of the year, after an arduous season of nearly ten years, my prayers were answered in the achievement of a pastoral position of my dreams.  This season was punctuated by a season of hope that lasted months.

2002

Wow, 20 years ago it was a leap back into another life!  I was in my first marriage, leading quite a jet-setting secular life, and my three daughters were in Primary School.  In some ways, it was the happiest and most content life but deep down within I wasn’t living the life of my calling.  I didn’t know it yet, but my life would be turned upside down in 12 months.  From this point in life, climbing the corporate ladder with one of the largest oil companies in the world, becoming a pastor would have been the last thing in my thoughts.

1992

Blast from the past again, here, I was working in mining maintenance on the tools in the hot northwest, I’d been married two years and my firstborn was born in this year.  I was 25 and a powerlifting bodybuilder.  There was no sign at this point of the desire to take up career two or career three.  I was content as a tradesman fixing large mechanical machines.

1982

I was in Year 10 High School this year and it was the year before I commenced trade training.  Music and cricket were big in my world.  I had good High School friends and we usually smoked cigarettes outside school at lunchtime.  By this stage in life I did know I wanted to be a fitter and turner (just like Dad).  At this stage in life, being married and a father in ten years was the farthest thing from my mind.

1972

I was five years old commencing Kindergarten.  Life was very isolated for Mum and Dad up in Dampier with no other family and Dad working a lot of overtime.  My younger brother and I were very active boys who loved to play outside in the heat.  Looking back at the family movies at the time, with Mum gone, I still can’t get over how long ago it was, but how that time seems to have flashed by.

1962

I wasn’t born yet, but my parents were “an item” and my existence was now possible.  Mum and Dad were courting whilst living in a small mining town called Bullfinch.  Dad was an apprentice and he and Mum enjoyed going to the pictures together.  Mum worked for the Bullfinch post office.

~

A life scan doesn’t just look back, it looks forward too.  So, I’ll project forward as far as I reasonably can.

2032

At this point, our son will be an adult, and there will be more grandchildren, perhaps another three, making seven overall.  Being 65, I hope to still be fully engaged as a minister for God whether in the church or secular life or both.  We’ll be 25 years married.  And I’m sure, with ten years more life lived, there will be a range of additional losses to grieve.

2042

I still expect to be working, though part time, especially serving God.  I anticipate I’ll be a great grandfather.

2052

If I’m still alive, I’ll be 85.  Still hope to be serving God in some capacity.  Hope to be married 45 years by this point.

2062

Even though I’ve covenanted to be alive still at this point (till 2067 actually), I really don’t expect to be alive at 92, but I’m willing if God allows.

~

The most humbling thing about life is the older you get the more you realise how short life is.  But when you’re young, a whole lifetime seems like longer than eternity itself.