Years ago, a guy by the name of John Ortberg wrote a book called
Everybody’s Normal Till You Get To Know
Them. I have often joked that we are all normal until you get to know us,
because I truly believe ‘normal’ is overrated.
The trouble is we tend to have a default that says I am not normal.
The proliferation of such a story within us simmers away and it
purges some, perhaps much, of our potential.
2016 was a crisis
year for me. For reasons that I cannot go into
here, I felt as though my character was under severe attack. It coincided with
my reading of Dr John Townsend’s The Entitlement
Cure. I read that book cover to cover and felt that it highlighted a
weakness that I had — that I was overly sensitive to needing to be understood,
to be respected, and to be praised. I truly wondered whether I was narcissistic.
For nearly an
entire year I sat on a desolate island of brutal character reformation.
I am glad I sat there. I am glad I allowed God to clamour
through my soul. And in all good conscience I needed to be there.
But two years on, I find I have a different perspective. I am
able to judge myself more accurately. Two years beforehand I thought I had
serious character faults that I needed to mature beyond.
The 2018 me can see that the kind of perspective that the 2016 me
didn’t have. Only now can I see that there was a latent effect of grief that I
hadn’t taken into account, but should have.
Now I know that the over-sensitivities that were piqued in the 2014–2016
period were due to external factors (losing Nathanael and other difficulties I
am not at liberty to publicise) impacting upon my highly-sensitive personhood. It
is only now that I know that being a highly sensitive person is normal.
It just seems that
I am one kind of normal
person.
It did me no harm to sojourn through the desert of 2016 — the worst
year of my life.
God carried me through a year where he stripped me back and
began the process of rebuilding me.
I felt in that year I had so many critics, yet I still don’t know
the truth of who was for me and who was against me. It seems to matter little
now. The main thing is that God got me through, and I’m better today, and I see
better than I have for years. And it seems that everybody else benefits from
the benefit I have received from God.
What I have
learned is that I’m normal.
You may not think that is remarkable. But perhaps you might ask
yourself, am I normal?
You are. You most certainly are.
No matter what you have or don’t have, you are about as normal
as the next person, no matter how abnormal you might be geared to think or feel
you are.
For years now, it has bothered me that I’ve been a highly
sensitive person, until I realised the strength in such a predisposition.
It is easy to be criticised for being a highly sensitive person,
yet that is an unbalanced view.
There are such advantages personally, interpersonally, and for
others in being a highly sensitive person.
The truth is the world needs more highly sensitive people, and that
we may be the hope of the
world. And perhaps God’s kingdom would flourish all the more if only more
highly sensitive people would come to see themselves as normal rather than as
abnormal.
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