I’m sure there are many who think forgiveness is a doormat experience, especially where there is no sign of contrition or repentance—no acknowledgement of wrongdoing, thanks for grace extended, or appreciation—in those who are being forgiven.
Forgiveness in such situations seems like such a silly and misguided thing to do. That is how it seems to us all from a worldly viewpoint. It is what the human eye devoid of the Spirit’s inspiration sees.
But the world of God is an upside-down Kingdom.
What seems to be victory is actually often defeat,
and what is defeat is often steeped in victory.
And the world, and humanity, cannot discern it.
But God revealed a ‘different gospel’ to an eye-for-an-eye at the Cross of Golgotha. And that revelation is a wisdom that we can observe and lay hold of personally in our own lives.
The essence of the Gospel is not only the life it bequeaths us in eternity, but the life it affords us in the here-and-now through a healing we receive through forgiveness.
But this is NOT the way of the world.
This is also NOT our default human priority.
The Gospel Way of forgiveness is neither natural
nor wise from a worldly viewpoint.
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These are irrefutable truths that play out in (most) people’s lives who abide by their own construct for justice—a self-conceived perception of what is right and wrong:
§ Unforgiveness leads to an ever-increasing hardening of the heart that further traumatises the self, which only further propagates exposure to ongoing triggering.
§ Forgiveness is framed as transactional and that does not bear well with a lack of reconciliation, which is by far and away the most common relational incidence requiring forgiveness.
§ So few entrenched conflicts resolve, the relationships usually get toxic and shatter.
§ When the choice is made to forgive, and especially in cases when it can’t be transactional, the person choosing to forgive continues to slip out of forgiveness into unforgiveness. This is because the trauma within has not yet been healed.
§ So often one side of entrenched conflict resists accountability and the narcissist-empath dynamic ensues, or in most toxic arrangements both resist accountability.
There must be a better way on earth as it is in heaven!
Where does our hope come from in redeeming these terrible instances of unforgiveness that imperil our hearts? From Jesus no less.
THE RESURRECTED BODY OF JESUS REMAINED “BROKEN”
The body of the resurrected Jesus Christ is a symbol for our eternal hope in redeeming these long-held hurts that have led to unforgiveness.
The body of Jesus post-resurrection bore the scars of the crucifixion He suffered. Those wounds—the wounds by which we have been healed—are visible to the eye and palpable to the touch of the disciples.
Why would God not ‘fix’ Jesus and
make His resurrection body perfect?
Well, the disciple Thomas, for just one,
needed to see and feel those wounds to believe.
But there is also another cogent reason:
God was showing humanity that scarring IS perfection.
Jesus’ resurrected body, whilst perfect, is marred and scarred. Resurrected in body and ready for the Ascension, Jesus’ wounds reveal a reality and a lesson for us all. It says something about our wounds, even as they continue to show.
Our woundedness, from an eternal perspective, that is our sinful imperfect nature, is already healed. We can approach the mercy seat of God with confidence knowing there is nothing to do other than agree that God in Jesus has done it all. There is no getting around how incomprehensible the goodness of God’s grace is. It is utterly inexorable.
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Christian faith is unique in this one way.
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Christian faith is the only faith-construct that equates brokenness with restoration, connecting God with humanity, a “broken” God attaining an enduring, eternal victory through apparent consummate defeat.
God shows humanity in His own example, how life comes after death, how hope replaces despair, simply through being weak to be strong.
THE LIFE OF JESUS, THROUGH HIS DEATH
Knowing that defeat redeems victory in a warped yet fundamentally true way, Christian faith sets itself apart as the only way to truly live a free life. Such a life is utterly paradoxical and totally against the ways of the world. But in living it, life oozes from us through death—death to ourselves. That’s faith! It is the way of Jesus.
Life in God is a life sown IN Him.
Such a life, though it gives up everything it cannot keep,
is a life abundant—with joy, hope, and peace.
Practically, it is classifying everything
not of God as unworthy of pursuit.
THIS is the victory of God in our lives
plainly through our worship of God alone.
Only when we give up winning in this life —yes, that is competing; and losing fear-of-missing-out—will we gain a glimpse of the next. Eternity is otherwise impossible to access. We cannot hedge our bets.
This life through death is never more poignantly lived than through the death to self of extending mercy toward someone who does not deserve it.
“We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus,
so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.”
— 2 Corinthians 4:10
What can the above mean other than what it literally means?
What can it mean to “carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body”? The death of Jesus left marks on His body, marks which Jesus knew needed to be SEEN and TOUCHED by His disciples. The simple and powerful message in this is that there is power in living as wounded healers.
Wounded healers are souls healed enough of their wounds that they “carry” their victory. They carry their victory into spaces where others can see and touch those wounds, and attest to the healing power of God to transform woundedness to wholeness.
No wounded healer is perfectly healed. On the contrary, those wounds—like Jesus’—are there for all to see and touch. A wounded healer is sufficiently vulnerable. They are safe in their expression of their woundedness, and those imperfections are a witness to the work of Christ in their mortal body. Wounded healers are humble and given to owning their wrongs.
The death of Jesus left marks on His body,
marks which Jesus knew needed to be
SEEN and TOUCHED by His disciples.
Others experience power when Christians
bear weakness of their own wounds,
not pretending any perfection,
in sincere vulnerability.
This takes a sustained commitment of humility.
The trouble with much of the world is it is in love with image, performance, and possessions. And these are our human defaults. We struggle to disentangle ourselves from these worldly desires—to be seen as capable, competent, confident, and in control.
But these worldly desires only lead to misery.
We forever chase what is often beyond
our control, and there is no peace there.
The Christian life is victory because we hold what we ALREADY possess. Indeed, in refusing to chase anything but the knowledge of God—to be hidden deep in our hearts—peace, joy, and hope come close immediately.
FORGIVENESS, THE EPITOME OF VICTORY
Forgiveness is THE central way we give up what we cannot keep to gain what we cannot lose. It is also THE central way that we achieve victory for others and ourselves.
The main thing the enemy of God wants is DIVISION. But when we overcome the temptation to hold unforgiveness in our hearts, we defeat the enemy through the power of God. Our God is a God of redemption, restoration, reconciliation.
There is a bigger picture than the hurts and betrayals and disappointments that we bear.
Worse than ‘paying someone back’ for their bad or evil deeds done is what our bitterness does to us. It constricts our thinking and our vision. More and more we become self-righteous. The bitterer we get the blinder we become. It is a real slippery slope. We must remember:
God knows what has been done,
and we must trust God
that His justice will be done.
If not now, it will come in the life to come.
In the meantime, we carry a heart of forgiveness, accepting what we cannot understand by surrendering it ALL back to Him. In that surrender, a miracle happens. Surrender weakens us sufficiently that in THAT kind of weakness we redeem God’s strength. In conceding we don’t have control, resisting the temptation to resentment, we agree to being beautifully broken for God’s glory. We agree to going the journey of lament.
The power of God is so strong that we only need to genuinely practise this surrender ONCE and we are convinced that surrender is both right and powerful.
The world cannot know it:
IN SURRENDER IS VICTORY
This is the authentic and victorious Christian life:
TO BE WEAK IS TO BE STRONG
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The chief form of strength in weakness is forgiveness.
